Meh...start of IUI#5

I don't know why but I have a cartoon in my head when thinking of this.  And it's got that corny announcer in a plaid jacket overlooking a horse race saying "And they're off!"  And then the camera pans down to a horse hanging out  in the gates eating a long straw of hay that then shrugs his shoulders and that noise "wa-wa-waaaaah" goes on in the background.  Seriously have no idea why this is what comes to mind :::shrugs like the cartoon horse:::


I do know that Tuesday was cycle day 4, and  got my baseline, and started the drugs.  Lather, rinse, repeat.....As needed.


This time though, I have a confession to make.  I forgot about all my little superstitious rituals.  I forgot to wear lucky socks from one of the girls gift packs.  I forgot to tuck my hope stone into my pocket, I forgot to wear my IF necklace or common thread bracelet.  I forgot it all.  Eh? I know it's not what does or does not make or break a cycle.  I know what it is, is something to help me remember I'm not alone.  That they're all reminders of friends and family and ideas to fight the emotional turmoil of this.  I guess I've done this enough that maybe I don't need them as much?  Or maybe I'm just not as excited this time that it's not filling my every thought? Or maybe I'm just tired.  So tired.  I have such a "Been there, done that" attitude.  When I went into the ultrasound room and she told me to get undressed waist down and use the paper sheet etc. I was like:  This is my sixth treatment cycle.  Not my first time to the rodeo (or horse race as the metaphor should be).

And that's kind of how this how this whole start to the cycle feels.
"Same old story, Same old song and dance"
Yet for the record as I always do....

AFC:  9 on right, 8 on left
Meds:  75iu Follistim started on cd4
Next monitoring?:  Friday May 24th 8am

What's new?:  Info given to me on BPAs harm to morph.   And research showing DH should "expel" everyday for 7-10 days before day of trigger shot.  This is new, and worries me a bit on how it will help or hurt his count.  We'll see next week I guess.  Please let it help, I'd hate for us to have done something that hurts our chances.  But it is funny to think poor man now has to either whack off everyday or have sex, and when I told him we wouldn't be having that much sex because it was "too much to handle"  he was sad.  But since I have to do shots everyday, it's like he's almost a little happy to have his own homework assignment.  ((Now picturing a horse with the biggest grin across it's face)).