Well, that hope was short lived.

BFN this morning.  Fully expect negative beta news this afternoon.  I had really only been hopeful and having bad phantom symptoms for the last three days or so.  But of course they helped me think it might have worked.  Right now I'm numb.  Like "really?  This is all my life has become."  Do these little medical cycles and fail.  It's getting harder to imagine a different outcome after so long, but I still daydream about it.   I spent yesterday on "positive thinking" trying to come up with visions in my head of later this year like "I'll be seven months pregnant at Christmas" etc.

I'm numb.  Just numb.  No tears yet, just tired.  Exhausted really.  So fucking exhausted.